Writing for who know's why.

I've had a serious case of nostalgia since I bumped my head last Summer. Pokemon! Those countless hours (okay, according to my game cartridge, 999 hours) of scrunching my eyes in dim light trying to see if my Lugia had leveled up, guessing that the little red light of my Gameboy meant I had ten minutes until had to save... Getting back into it is all too similar in the limitless potential. The game has changed, and I have changed. I have reached the limits of time usefully spent on the device. Sad, to know this game has little left to offer me after it being in my life for so long. My life has some major restructuring coming up, and in the past that has meant I change too. I'm driving this change... in the future. Not yet, I'm dragging my heels on this one. You musn't use too big a hook, lest you catch too big a fish.

Blesséd Living

Put on albums from youtube. Interview on Hallow' een. Feeling incompetent for the school work for this weekend. Group's relying on me, gotta teach myself. Can't get myself to work like a robot. Could go for a run, could give myself something to work toward for motivation. Or remain unproductive.

Undivided Self Interest

Take away thoughts of anyone or anything other than myself. Note that who I am reflects some of these relations to things outside of me, but think only in terms of me. Now, what would I look to be later on? I would like to be happy without being content. There will still be a future self for my future self, with room to improve. I would like to make less of a mess of relations with people as I go through my life, not that I am doing dismally now but it is an area that could use improvement. And I would like to be challenged in my abilities, mentally, without losing all my hair over it. Where am I now? Actually, what do I want now, because that is more useful. I want a partner that keeps things interesting and is attractive to me. I want to prepare myself for future success. I have half-assed desires like running a triathlon, writing a book, writing campaigns, writing music, playing instruments... What did I want then? Life.

Feb

My day started off pretty sucky when the dog woke me up and broke the candle casing. But listening to Kesha's Die Young while watching the fog lift off the pond and the waterfowl clustered in coveys split by species of geese, coots, pipers, and duck. Going to insist on having a good day today!

Illium

My new sword was destroyed today. I will get a new one in about a week. I am tired, crushed, and a little wanting. Not lust, but to be wanted. Or used. Or cared for. Or marginally thought about when there is not a social pretext to think about me. Except for my family, I feel I am lacking in this regard. Good night!

Election Day

Yes, I don't get to vote today.

I will have a good day despite that.

Life is good right now.

I am busy, and there is a bit of debt hanging over me right now. Not financial necessarily, just things I owe friends.  Also, a little bit of stress. I am living, and I am alive. :)

You belong in Wildflowers

You belong in a boat out a sea. You belong in my arms, you belong somewhere you feel free.

Thank you Tom.

I am intelligent, modest, and generally open minded. My wants are few, and I have a wonderful collection of friends and family. I also am free to do what I want with my life, which is quite overwhelming.

I am usually slightly unhappy or neutral in my emotion, despite everything I do generally making me in a position where I could be happy.

I enjoy my life and being comfortable.

I am content.

Elhum ever after

Today, I walked into the room. They were there, and it went mostly with normalcy. What havoc have I wrought in the name of personal fulfillment?

The Nostalgic Campaign

Considering writing a campaign. It will be a drain on time and thinking. If it is successful, then I will feel good. I suppose there are ways to spend my time that have a less certain outcome. Indeed it was successful. They got through the cave only. Now, of course, I have fresh concerns. Yum, get 'em fresh! :(

Today

I am comparitively happy. I have an hour to take an online portion of an accounting essay and I have studiously avoided taking it thus far by reading up on the patch for windows (starting from the reference to its significance on eee) by reading the first article on google that I thought sounded legitimate and it was slashdot's article on the topic which of course led to a lond and eventually totally different discussion with much mild humor involved, leading to me wiki-ing slashdot, and then Tux, and then a quickie to Calvin and Hobbe's comic with "you insensitive clod" and then, finally, the king of online smart humor, XKCD. Which, while reading about leopards was thoroughly entertaining before reading the punchline, had me laughing once i made the obvious connection: replace keyboard with leopard!!!!

Other stuff in my life right now also has put me in a posiiton to appreciate this birdwalking. Think I am ready to te-te-test!

Human Bio Project

A Study Buddy of mine posted a status that said we are who we hang out with. At first I took this to mean she is proud to have her network of friends, and how social and cool they are and therefore she is. But then I thought occasionally and more critically on the idea, and the idea is an update to the "its who you know that counts" maxim. In the era of technology, or I should say this era of technology because that has become a synonym for 'in the modern era', work and who you will be is less about personal devotion and motivation. The lone entrepreneur takes second to the group worker, a transmutation of worker bee who is both well connected socially and able to manage her tasks in the web of work relations. This idea is expressed in the (December?) Kiplinger Letter, and take a look around you for the proof: Parallel programming, think tanks, boards of directors, group contracts for teams instead of hiring person by person to name a few. While this introduction leans heavily in favor of a future work related necessity for this network, I intend this exhaustive biography of the people in my life out of personal interest: a snapshot of who I know or knew, what I might write of them at the age of 19, and hopefully to retain a much larger pool of knowledge of people I know. Of course, given time and interest constraints, I may never get very far and given the nature of the formidable task, I will never be finished. But I will work with the Protestant work ethic. "Do not wish to be anything but what you are and try to be that perfectly." ~Francis De Sales

Mr. Ian Williamson - Second half of seventh grade science teacher. He was brilliant, fun, and great even with the huge classes he had. Ross, Andrew, Jonathon, and I would go to his chess club during lunch sometimes, which was very fun. After middle school, I would see him at Dino Dashes, and he even came in in the 10k right behind me during my freshman in college try. One of my favorite teachers.

Mrs. Barahas - First half of seventh grade science teacher. I know sixth grade was a tough act to follow, but something about her teaching style didn't work for me. I switched half way through the year.

Mrs. Flores - Orchestra Director of Middle School! Wow, I really don't know what to say. She fostered a love in music in each of us that continues, for me, today in my playing at IVC. She kept it fun for us by adding pop music or movie themes to our repertoire. Jonathon, Andrew, and I remained close friends and no doubt orchestra played a huge role in that. Jonathon and I stayed in the back of the section for sixth grade (hope there's no hurt feelings there Jon) but once she moved me to the Cello section part way through seventh grade, Jonathon quickly challenged his way to second, and then first chair. In orchestra in 8th grade, I laughed the hardest, longest, and most painfully (in a good way) for no reason except that I hit my knee on accident with my hand. :) It was really tough saying goodbye to her, and Tim was lucky enough to have her his three years as well. When she had to leave Utt, it was really devastating news to all of us.

Mr. E-something. - Shame I can't remember his name right now. He was my Science teacher in 6th Grade, and one of my favorite teachers. He had me gathering rocks during my family trips, and deciding what kind of rock it was, whether it was sedentary, metamorphic, or igneous. I acted like Hermione in that class, raising my hand at every opportunity, eager to learn, going over whole tests directly after taking them with friends and fretting over the completeness of my answers. :) In eight grade, I used an elective period to be his aide, an opportunity I'll never regret. Those days of grading, reminiscing, cutting sheets of paper, making copies, and overall just remembering how it was jumping from elementary to middle school, right when I was preparing to jump from middle to high school. He had a kid and wife, I think he moved somewhere after that year, too bad Timmy didn't get to have him.

Mrs. Laura - P.E. instructor in 6th grade. We would sit on our numbers, and do stretches or run sometimes before our actual day's events. I did not care for running at that time. Mrs. Laura reminded me of one of those V.H.S. workout leaders. Energy! Plus she taught the circus and dancing sections.

Mrs. Stark - One of the hardest teachers I ever had. I still liked her, somewhat. She just got behind, assigned a lot of homework compared to what I was accustomed to, and I insisted on challenging myself with a book project on a pseudo-author of the Hardy Boys series. She taught three periods, something like Literature, History, and English. I remember our group in that class would go on to become the group in our year's honors group at THS: people like Laila Yousufi, Jonathon Wooldridge, Joey Soter?. There was a girl who pronounced words like Nevada and moccasins with the emphasis on the wrong syllable, to our amusement. I also remember Mrs. Stark telling me I could trash some old assignment, which was several pages. I would rip one out at a time and crumple it (one at a time). :)

Mrs. Vincent - Math Teacher in 6th grade. At first, I didn't do well or enjoy the class, which, given that the class were people just like me (people who did poorly in math in 5th grade) is not surprising. But I led a small group of students who understood the material, or were persistent enough to keep going at it until they did, to our success in the class. I don't remember many of the people in that group, only a few faces, and the name Rubio. Nevertheless, Mrs. Vincent, who was friends with Stark and had credentials for both English and Math, knew what she was about, and taught the class well.

Mrs. Amicay - I don't remember much about her, except that the class was still fun, and a lot of subjects were covered. I did so poorly on the last math test, and took extra time, and yada yada, that I took 6th grade math with Mrs. Vincent, instead of continuing with Jonathon in, I think Pre-algebra? Regardless, this incident put me on the path to being in the same class as Urian, so I don't look back in sadness. Promotion: they played Takin' Care of Business, the reinforcement of me looking at that as my favorite song, a favorite that lasted until I turned 17. They also gave us palm tree pencils, which only lasted about a year. :P

Mr. Chen - Fourth grade teacher. Played Pachebek's Canon, Takin' Care of Business, fostered interest in reading and learning. He likes Barney, and ran Dino Dash and helped with Nelson's carnival with the toilet bowl roll. He was my 2nd favorite elementary school teacher, after Mrs. Bentley.

Mrs. Bentley - Infamous jelly-beans for right answers, doing well on tests, no reason at all. :P My third grade teacher, I think she left Nelson before Timmy could have her, but she remains one of my favorite teachers ever, and inspired me to learn, and learn as best I could. I'm still working on that.

Mrs. Enda - First Grade Teacher, I liked her a lot. She might be my favorite teacher, I don't know its been a long time. I went to Hawaii for two weeks during that year. I had trouble with math, and had a project for the sea in a shoebox.

Aisha Harris - Former cellist in Utt and Tustin High School Orchestras. Year younger than me, she quit before my senior year, and was in beginner orchestra in seventh grade.

Alaina Davreux - Canadian friend. I met her during the Canada trip in the summer before my Freshman year, but only really talked to her later, Sophomore year or so. We chatted on the through electric devices, and she invited me that winter. Her family was cool with it, and I spent a week in Osooyos in December of 2010. Its nice to have a friend to talk to all the time, though she's getting more an more busy now.

Alex Chay - My year, went to Nelson and maybe Utt. He had an interesting taste in things, hung out with Ross, and later with Andrea, Alana, and a few others. I saw him very briefly before one of our weekend trips, and he comes to IVC band concerts.

Alexei Burgoa - Peer in my year, High School friend. I know him as a bando, though he also was in many of my classes and probably did MUN.

Alexis King - Girl I know through Calculus with Miguel. She's a year younger than me, but she's in one of the UC's now. She did volleyball.

Allen Dang - Neighbor across the street since middle school or so. He and I carpooled to Tustin High, which later was his sister and I, then her and Timmy. He was an MUN-er, Orchestra violinist, and cross-country runner. He went to community college, and then to a University in Arizona, which is where he is now.

Allen Huang - Senior at Tustin High when I was a freshman, our concertmaster and a very respectful, nice, and positive man. He also was a runner. He is studying classics at Stanford.

Alyssa Mattox - Neighbor across the street since her birth. She's about a year younger than me. The Mattox's were home-schooled, Alyssa, Melita, Timmy, and I used to hang out in the cul-de-sac playing until the street light came on, at which time we would have to go inside for dinner. We would not pass the No Through Traffic sign. Possibly my first crush, and the fastest one I ever I've gotten over. :) She's about to get married and is living with her fiance.

Amanda Cox - Peer from Nelson to Tustin. She was in Spanish with me.

Andre Ness - Peer in High school, a transfer student from Spain who ended up living in Orange County.

Andrea Vocos - I've known her since Elementary School, I think. Now, she's in New York. Very knowledgeable of pop culture, likes up-and-coming things. I think I walked to promotion with her. She was part of the group of peers in honors and APs together. Elderidge's class and Wood's.

Andrew Hoang - Peer a year younger than me. Good guitarist, friend of Shane's. He goes to UC Santa Barbara now. He was in Calculus with me.

Andrew McCracken - Peer who was in my English classes. He works at Inn'n'Out, and played baseball. A friend of Kevin Vasguez.

Andrew Robert Neumayer - We have been friends since elementary school, met through Jonathon. He is one of the Three Musketeers or Los Amigos: Jon Andrew and I stuck it out through Nelson, Utt, Tustin High, and now are in different colleges. His tastes, beliefs, preferences are different than mine, but we also share a love for classical music (though his probably trumps mine) and the outdoors, and traveling to foreign places. A Mormon Opera lover, Andrew invited us to his performance in Der Zuperfloten at his college, BYU in Provo, Utah. He is currently in a mission in Germany. Living his dream, in other words.

Angela Phan - Girl in Cassie's year, very approachable and down-to-earth. She and I went to Tustin Tillers together one year just because we could. I've also gone to Pizza Shack with her. She was in track, cross country, orchestra, and now is becoming an Architect at Cal Poly Pomona.

Annie Jalota - Smart girl in my year. Only knew her in High School, but in that time she became friends with everyone, lead MUN in our senior year, balanced band and all her APs, and had fun. She is now at Claremont McKenna College.

Brandon Huyn - A guy I knew in high school. Befriended in Junior year or so, physics. We made a boat together, could have been a good friend. He had some problems, insomnia and depression and maybe aggression. He worked at Pizza Shack and dated Laura Greek, he's kinda fallen off the grid. He still has a bike of my Dad's.

Cassie Mitchel - I've known her since my first year of running as a freshman, but I only got to be her friend in Sophomore year. I got to know her as a friend how i could confide in. She is a hero and I idolize her: she runs really well, realizes her goals, and is very down-to-earth and a great friend. Though we haven't shared as many memories as I would like, I know I can count on her as a close and trustworthy friend. She's currently running for/with a college in Colorado.

Chad Kerr - Elementary friend. Jonathon Wooldridge, Andrew Neumayer, Chad, and sometimes Ross Cook and I would hang out in the corners of the playgrounds and make up games to play. Chad once got in trouble for threatening Jonathon because Chad always wanted to set the rules of the game, or change them, or whatever. He was an alright kid though, he and I were sometimes picked on and we could bear together better than by ourselves. When we saw him at Utt in 7th grade or so, it seemed like he had become one of those kids that transfers to a million schools.

Christina Ontiveros - Acquaintance from at least Utt-THS. She might have been at Nelson, its hard to remember. She was part of a group of us that ended up being in a lot of AP and honors classes together. Shes fun, smart, Latina. She was in MUN, Elderidge's, Wood's, Levine's, Hugh's, and probably more.

Danielle Martin (Dani) - Friend through our dads. You-know! Uno! :) Going places with our families is always fun, so sailing, motorcycling/ATV-ing, skiing, and the myriad of things we do can only be more fun with Danielle there. She's a really great equestrian now, and will be going to Virginia to follow her passion.

Derek Martin - Friend through our dads. He was always a little more intense than me, avoiding board games where I would avoid 9:00 rides at the desert. Nonetheless a guy with his heart in the right place. Lots of childhood memories with this guy, his sister, my brother, the Wagners. My middle name might have been Derek, but this guy came first! :) Right now he's intent on physical fitness, and has ambitions to open his own international gym.

Ed Argyle - He was one of the senior runners when I started running at THS. He also was at UCI my freshman year, graduating with a double major in poli-sci and film. He coached hockey, THS lacrosse, and currently coaches THS cross-country. Great, if sometimes seeming apathetic. He really isn't, he puts a lot of work into what he is passionate about, and really is a outgoing and caliber guy. I still call him for random advice. He balanced parties, coaching, working two jobs, leader for a program that lobbied in Sacramanto, and school. I believe he now works with a movie company based in Newport.

Ellen Greek - High school cross country and track friend. Sister of Laura Greek, she's a lot of fun.

Frank Martin - Friend of my Dad's since high school. Famous for appearing on "Martin's time", he is a do-it-yourself type with a great ear for music, a healthy love of the sea, and having fun in the outdoors. Besides the trips to ocean, mountain, and desert, he brought his family to Diamond Lake, and participated in the 50K biking event at Dino Dash.

Govanny Rodriguez - AKA the beast, one of the hurdlers of track. He was not injured the season I hurdled, and did reasonably well. He had a good form, and hopefully he will do well this year. He is a little apprehensive about the coach from football this year.

Haighley ? - Girl in my Econ class. Elementary Student Teacher. She, Jeromy, and I are pals in Winter Global Econ. International Studies major, I think, probably a freshman.

Isaac Smith - Guy in Collin's year, he has a great attitude on life, is an excellent runner and a great friend. Unfortunately I don't have much time to hang out with him, but a great guy to know nonetheless.

Jaimie Nguyen - I've known her since elementary school. Famous in cross-country for her high and quiet voice, she is a valuable friend. She would carry lots of snacks, because her mom knew she would only eat, if it was a little at a time, so to make up for the little packages was the amount of little snacks. She was a varsity runner at one point, I think. She used to go on the bus in Middle School, we'd wait at the bus stop together. She dated Pierre senior year, they might still be together.

Jennifer Davreux - Alaina's sister, is studying how to be an animator, she's really artistic. She's had ambitions to write stories, she doodles a lot. She did really well in school, but her passion is in art. She likes Disney. She had just come back to her parent's home for winter break when I was there winter of '10.

Kayla Baten - Like the other Keila, she was Utt ASB president for a semester. She went to Tustin High school, however. There, she was part of the peer group that ended up in the same AP and honors classes. She also was part of Advance Theater Arts. Now, she is at another UC.

Keila Halili - Popular girl at Utt, I knew her as a stand partner for the cello. She played a quarter size. She also was ASB president one semester. She went to Ocia (dunno how to spell that) and was a cheerleader.

Ken Davreux - Linda's husband and Alaina's/Jen's Dad. I first met him summer before college, the next time I saw him was when he drove his RV down to Irv Seaver's and took me to Disneyland. A family man who moved from Ontario Canada. He got a math degree in college, and now works at the real estate office with his wife.

Linda Davreux - My dad's old neighbor, Alaina's mother and an excellent cook. She took care of me during my stay in Canada in the Winter on 2010. She is a real estate person. She has ambitions to learn to drum.

Luis Hernandez - Friend I had as a kid. We made the Australia poster after our state projects, at my insistence. I even met him during his detention to work on it, a habit going back to second grade. I would sometimes give up snack to hang out with him at detention, and I felt like I was visiting a prisoner, a jailed person. I have him to thank for knowing I am not gay. Haven't seen him since elementary school. Scratch that. Saw him at IVC when I decided to help some random Thursday. He played clarinet and is moving over to the sax. He plays with a group that plays reggae and ska.

Luis Molina - High School acquaintance. He is dedicated, became an AP and honors student. He hung out with Carlos Cavarupias, Jose Sanchez, some other guys. He's a cool guy. Duke.

Mike Jensen - Golf buddy, traveling companion, and former boss of my dad, Mike Jensen has done many activities outside of the work setting with Dad. He and his family went with us on our first trip to Costa Rica. He lives in Tustin as a retiree now.

Moses Jensen - Son of Mike Jensen, I met him (again) in Costa Rica during my first trip there. He is in the music industry, doing I don't know exactly what, but by helping Mike Jensen get the music of Moses on his iPod, I got access to a wealth of music. Most of my music library is from his CD's.

Nathan Oh - Middle child of the Oh family, Nathan was who I tutored for cello for the Fall of 2010. I'm proud with his dedication and abilities as a young cellist.

Patricia Anderson - Peer in middle/high school. She talked a lot, which was important in discussion-based classes like English. She works retail now, I believe. She's invited me to bring Jessie to meet her dog, haven't gotten around to it.

Rooney Paulito - Peer in high school, was one of the athletes of my year in varsity cross country and track. He and Linda (also cross country for the first years) were an item. Now he is pursuing his interests in OCC, which includes running with their distance team.

Timothy Daniel Wassenaar - AKA Brother Bear, Tim, Timmy. We've always been pretty much perfect for each other. Parties where we don't know anyone, we scope out together, then end up having a good time. We can make fun out of just about anything, though we favor video games and sports over everything else. He has done a lot of things that I did his age, I respect those choices as his, he is his own person. He is currently experiencing high school.

Urian Borda - Math class together each year of high school, as well as a host of other classes. We hit it off, best friends since then. Indoor skydiving, sailing, kayaking, biking, skiing, tennis, a host of other activities.

Draught of Living Death story:: 16 ounces of hell.
Blanket gift:: cross-bone decor is not appropriate for hospitalized patients
Trash can :: bins in line are not usable until purchased, and only by the purchaser.


Victoria Lee - Cool friend, we met in Fabio's Humanities discussion. We became friends in math 2B lectures, along with Eric. I try to keep in touch, she is a great person and a better friend.

Xander Wassenaar - Cousin in Arkansas, I haven't met him yet.

What is the Cost

Now the title might have you thinking this is economics-related. Sorry, just a poem.

What is the cost
of the love I have lost?

Is it the disguised opportunity
of a man, newly free?

Or is it truly a failed test,
a "...so I'm depressed."

Each chance I had to win her over,
or at least a little closer,

the words would fall out of place
or not come out right just like right here.

And when all was set, just like rehearsed,
something would not fit the verse.

Don't get me wrong, I told her one day.
She also said the perfect thing to say.

She didn't dis me or tell me how she felt.
It just wasn't a good play with the hands we were dealt.

So, did I pay dearly for my lofty love?
Or was it a good deal, considering I can now rise above?

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #8

3/29/10
Yes, I skipped a day. Which, in essence, is like skipping two days.
~
The rest is undecipherable. And the rest is math notes and occasional blips. Here's one to Victoria, back when I had a crush on her:
To the unsympathetic
ear it might seem lame
And I agree its pathetic,
these feelings I can't tame.
But with Spring flourished this feeling
of a crush but not crushing:
A hurt without want of healing
and a heart with blood rushing.
Why is it called a crush?
When I fell light and in love
I love the euphoria, the rush,
the pairing of unerring doves.
Already she was depressed with me
Though not by my doing
And it made me a little happy-
Bringing 'perfection' to ruin.
But I don't want perfect!
I want whatever she is
and regardless of what defect
it might have, that love is my bliss.

~
and one more, but I'd rather not share it. The rest is scratch work. Thats it for now!

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #7

3/27/10
This day-of-no-plans was crammed. In a relaxing way, of course. Talking of courses, we started with a brunch at Crystal Cove, a place I would enjoy with more friends this summer. For today, I had a Mexican-influenced breakfast featuring an egg sunny side up, tortilla strips, filet mignon and a host of smaller particulars. Aunt Ann, the birthday girl, shared a generous amount of her macadamia nut pancakes with coconut syrup (made at Beachcomber's). After dining, I gingerly walked in the waves and, just ass I felt ready to swim, walked back up the shore. We visited Roger Gardens and then I drove from home to THS. After dropping Timmy's racket off along with the sports shorts I was going to wear, I took the first steps to coaching: getting the hurdlers out of the shade and running the track and the a few hurdles. Giovanni: I can coach, but I will leave the injured Kelvin to his own devices.
For next week: Monday is just running laps. Tues or Thurs will be block starts only. Wednesday will be half 110s, half sprints. The other T-day is open but should be a relatively restful day. Friday should be distance or at least running laps. I have to figure out when I can leave UCI and what time. It may well be too busy a quarter to take coaching too.
~
Coaching couldn't happen, because. prophetically, it was a busy quarter.

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #6

3/26/10
Fred Fred Burger Fred Fred Burger Fred Fred Burger! I can spell my name! Fred, F-R-E-D-F-R-E-D-B...U...R... ... ... ...GER! Fred Fred Burger!
Well...mostly was preparing for school next week. You know...put in three calendar'r reading assignments, then not look at them and asking my peers what I'm supposed to read and by when instead.
But I did go to Tustin's track meet, the first they put on and second that I've attended this year. For once we had more people helping than needed; regarless I whole-heartedly became keeper of the hurdles. Okay, I make it sound grander than it is, but I did move them from W110 H to M110, then made manifest the migration of fleets for the 300s. And I was responsible for a great deal of the clean-up process.
I think I should be in Hurdles coach. I have little experience, a lot of ambition, and enough guts and time to make it happen. But little is certain.
After the Track Meet, we went to Pake and Beppe's. We greeted the Colorado-based Wassenaars, ate pizza, soda, and for some some beer. We all enjoyed the family time. Possibly the highlight was meeting Matt's girlfriend and questioning her, a pleasant and potential-full girl.
~
Her name is Rachel. Matt is Randy's friend.

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #5

3/25/10
Nothing compares to pulling into the Target parking lot singing "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gayner with Urian. I have a recording of it on my cell, I'll have to see if it turned out any good. Why Target? To lament the loss of the electric section (its going to be a produce section) and get Marianne and Urian's dad presents for their respective birthdays. Of course this followed our exercising time, held at the same tennis court as the previous tennis match, only this time for two hours. Surprisingly, we were doing well for a good deal of time. Paulina called, apparently wanting a repeat of the conversation held on Tuesday. I'd rather not talk too much with her; I haven't needed my stress stone in a while.
Also something of tragic note: Jessie was bit one her walk with mom and dad. She should be fine, but it was alarming and might dissuade Jessie from being so eager for her walks. Doubtful.
About Marianne's party: It IS on Saturday. Apparently Urian is going to sing "Its Raining Men." I think I will just wing-it: either choose not to sing or choose one I know once I'm at the place. Time to do what Wassenaar's do best!
~
like post post script in the diary? starting to become more active that spring break... makes me feel I should be more active now...

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #4

3/24/10
Probably the most interesting thing that happened yesterday was a viewing of "Seven Samurai" by my choice at about 7:00. I had to record the end though, because Timmy has school today. Its pretty cool: a '54 Japanese (subbed in English) black and white with colorful language but also occasional thoughtful lines, scenes, and actions. Regardless of the stereotypical content, I was content to watch it for its compelling vitality, even ad a 55 year old movie.
I also, working backwards, went to the gym with Vijay and drove to get the haircut that was pretty much everything I wanted in a haircut: almost the same length, but less heavy. (In other words I paid $30 for a lot of styling and a lot of 'spin' on what was occurring.) But that's all good because I didn't know what I want, just what I didn't want: too short or too dramatic a change. I wonder if I could apply the same concept to the major dilemma? Which is of course which major do I want to pursue and, more distantly and importantly, what job will I pursue? I like how I word it as my job as opposed to more economically (in what service or to what firm will I sell my labor) or socially (how will I contribute back to the society that I grew up in). Its more political this way.
~
Sorry.

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #3

03-23-10
Yesterday, I played Metroid Prime. The day was focused around exercising with Urian, which actually turned out much differently than what either of us would have predicted. I did not read the book Mom left out for me to read, only because how much I wanted to just about equaled how much I wanted to do something else. But back to exercising. We biked to Tustin Sports Park, started playing tennis, and were doing rather well. Some guy approached us, asked if we could help him move his car to the nearest (downhill) gas station. Apprehensively, we agreed, put our bikes and rackets in his car, and pushed the car down the hill, through a left-turn and into the Shell gas station. I accidentally broke his taillight and judging by how little gas he put in, he won't be getting a new one, but it still felt good to do something nice. My bad, random dude, thanks for the workout!
~
One of the more telling stories, I think. Urian didn't know I broke the taillight until he read this, he went a step beyond me in pushing, and then giving him some change so he had an even $5 to put in for gas. The guy also dropped his cell phone, twice, once during the left-hand turn, and once near the curb.

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #2

3-22-10
Official Beginning
Hello, my name is Ryan and this is my journal. Well, an entry in one of the journals. I suppose I will start with yesterday, though the events of yesterday were of a general normality so as to seem fresh in my short term memory but quick to be replaced by different memories, whether the new memories hold more or less weight than yesterday's memories. Like an escalator having someone who weighs 110 pounds on one step and, one revolution later, holds a new person on the step. Unless of course the 110 pound person ran back up the escalator at a pace that allowed her to step on the same step for the next revolution. But even then, her weight would be different by a Wii-Fit-board measurable amount because she ran up the automated stair system.
The less-than-precise middle of my morning began with the conclusion of car-washing: car-drying. I picked out a medley of melodies with my essential rock classics CD and dad's essentially acoustic 6-string guitar. I take that back: I was playing on my guitar with the amp that is a sprinter.
I also began Metroid Prime 2, which is predictably better than the first and unpredictably less nauseating for me. Now that I'm thinking of it, I'll go play.
~
Oh, the glories of spring break. Need I say more?

Diary Entries from Freshman Year #1 continued

After she left, I thought about why I didn't ask if I could come meet her friends. Probably a stupid idea. But it seized me, and I felt I would feel regret later if I didn't did not ask. So, I called her, and, as my capability allowed, asked (hopefully cordially) if I could go to lunch with them (who? Corinne-plus-a-friend who I want to meet, possibly a second time?) She kindly said not this time, maybe another. Using the rejection clause as a way to foot my foot in the door, I said she should let me know when we could hang out. I have little hope that she will call me--this reason or last--but am happy that such dialogue and interaction occurred and is bound to happen again. Thus, though the classes near end, perhaps this friendship will be more everlasting.
~
Indeed, it was not. Facebook friends?